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Monday, December 27, 2010

Last holiday!

This holiday season was with lots of happiness, friends and family. But it wasn't without a little sadness! Couldn't be helped. I am missing my better half. The most important half of my life. My love, my best friend! With him across the world defending against who knows what with weapons only a handful of people know how to work. I just praise God that he is still alive and pray the weeks left till his arrival home pass quickly and very boringly. (Is that a word?)

And Christmas is not without a trip to the Emergency Room either. At least one child of many in our family spends the evening at the hospital for something. This year was our turn. My poor daughter got a concussion while sliding at the big slides in downtown Omaha Christmas evening. We were only there for approximately 40  minutes but it was long enough to get hurt. It was scary to see and hear her not remember anything except who I and her siblings were. She did not recognize her own grandmother who we have been staying with for the past month. Super scary and I do not want a repeat. Thank goodness she is doing much better today! :)

So today starts the last week of 2010. The start of a new year. January is starting to be my most favorite month of 2011 and it hasn't even started yet!!! A birthday, a homecoming and lots of love!

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

We're here!

After a week of packers, movers, cleaning and then another week of traveling, we made it safely to Nebraska! *Cheers and Hollers!* We beat snow, ice, and wind chills just in time. One week later (last weekend) we get our first taste of frigidness in the form of wind chills proceeded with snow. Not a lot of snow, just enough that the Monkeys can romp in it and pray to God for lots more for a white Christmas.

We are here two weeks already. One break down so far by oldest Monkey for missing her friends and church back in Virginia. But happy that we are here safe and with all sanity in tact. Now all that's left is for the Husband to come home! One more month and we are reunited. Weeks are under 10. So now it really is the last leg and I can hardly wait. :)

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Thankful

Tonight I sit here thankful. I'm glad for my family. I'm glad for my friends. With so much going on, I feel thankful to God for bringing such wonderful people in my life.
So far, I am thankful for my husband, who is awesome, loves me and is my best friend. I'm thankful we can Skype nearly everyday. It has made this deployment significantly less burdonsome, although not any less stressful.
And my family. Both my in laws and my own. :) God granted me a wonderful family. Sure sure, we have some drama but who doesn't. Although I dislike drama, makes life difficult, messy. And I'm thankful for the lack of it for now!
Family for helping and supporting me! :) And my husband for always being my best friend and much more.

Sunday, October 31, 2010

We're Getting Ready

Things are gearing up. Packers and Movers are scheduled. Walk through with the movers is on Wednesday. I have help to clean soon after. I have help to take the Hubs car also. WHoohoo! I'm ready to get going.

My house also has an offer in the works! We're waiting on inspection and then approval from HAP. Pray it goes through and that repairs are fairly cheap and easy to repair. We really need those prayers!

Moving and moving. I need lists. And maybe a secretary so I can keep my life straight for the next three weeks. Can ya'll believe there is only three weeks left? With offers on the house, moving, soccer, Awana, school and Church I'm about to lose my marbles. Well. What's left of them.

I do enjoy being busy but it sure has me a coo coo trying to keep it all straight. My kids are reminding to do this or this. Oh and I'm supposed to be assisting Alex in potty training. Not so good on my end. I'm not very consistant. Potty training is FUN. Right?

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Gladly tired

I am going through a crazy time right now. Moving is crazy business and it makes me wish that we could just stay in one place. I always wondered what that would be like? To stay in one place for over 5 years? To not move and establish roots and watch them grow for 20+ years? Who knows. . . .

I actually enjoy moving really. Finding a new place, making new friends and all. But it's hard work too. Hard to find a new church and a niche where you get your new groove on. I wish I could bring all my favorite things with me from all the places I've lived and smoosh it all into one. That would be nice.

All this makes me tired and gladly so. Means I'm doing what I need to. :)

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Busy? What's that?

You know, I was looking towards this fall with joy thinking life was going to be not so busy since we're moving soon. And the children are not involved in half the stuff they are normally.

WRONG.

Fall is when everything thats normal starts.

Soccer
AWANA
Co-op
Throw in your doc appts......
and a deployment...
and my house on the market.

Now you have yourself a crazy Mom.

School is year round at this point in my house so that never really changed.
And now I'm trying to move us to NE before snow hits there.

So. Where is my sanity you ask? Somewhere over the Atlantic Ocean sitting/walking in a big desert country where it's over 100 degrees every single day.

But, alas, I have a busy fall. Hope my spring is much calmer than my fall/winter. I am tired. I am just ready for my husband to come home. 17 months is just too long. I am not sure how I've lasted 12 months so far but I have, thanks to God and to super friends and family.

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

I love our pediatrician, she's AWESOME

Took Ham to the pediatrician today. Mainly to help me feel better, normal? I don't know but I'm glad I did. My Ham, even though having a seizure just 4 days ago, is totally back to her normal self. She was literally bouncing off the walls telling jokes and reading books. Doctor comes in and asks, "What is wrong?" with an odd look on her face. Heh, now what?!?!?! Her doctor is passionate about supporting those with neurological issues. Which makes *me* as a mom feel better.

I love my kids pediatrician. Have I told you this? She knows my children by name, asks about them when on the off chance I only bring the appropriate child to the appointment. Asks about their dad. Asks if I have lost my marbles. I wish I could bring her with us.

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Heart outside your body?

This past weekend was one of the worst of my whole life. Watched one of my children have a seizure. I think that and not being able to help her or even know what to do was the worst thing. Ever. And then to have doctors tell different reasons why or that they don't know for sure why. Plus having the Hubs not here doesn't help at all. Stress really did hit the fan and all I could was cry. Cry out to God that He would heal her and the docs would have some answers. The Comforter to comfort my husband for being so far away. I can't imagine how he must feel. I know how *I* felt with him not here. Thank you Lord for family and friends willing to help with my other children.

Friday, September 10, 2010

What are YOU learning?

Sometimes stress hits the fan. And that's only when the Hubs is home. When Hubs is deployed, stress seems to hit the fan a bit more often. Okay, maybe a little more. Today was a busy day so my stress level was a bit higher. And now it's 12:36 at night and I'm almost done. All I want to do right now is cry myself into an exhuasted sleep. Srsly. Tomorrow is about as busy as today with soccer clinic in the morning and then a birthday celebration in the evening. I hope to get some laundry done and prep work in for Sunday in the afternoon.

This does not include the normal stresses of vehicles not working, palmetto bugs coming in my house, daily care of children, sale of home that comes with the added bonus of visitors I don't know, school and then, to top it all off, all my kids need some special time with Mom and here I sit after midnight just to get some ME TIME. Any wonder why stress hits the fan?

Just having a tired moment I guess! :) It's time to just relax, I may need to invite some friends over for a dinner party!

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Hello?

Schooling is going great. I love having school at home. I feel more organized and life seems to flow easier. Not that I'm great at organizing. I'm horrible at it. I need to call in reinforcements every few months to help keep myself in check. Especially when the Mister is deployed. Heck, even when the Mister is home. Especially when he is home. I love teaching my kids. At least for now. I may change my mind tomorrow. You never really know with me. I'm sorta wishy washy that way.

Lately I've been more diligent in making sure all our schooling gets done and in a timely manner. Which has helped in the behavior department. Better schedules and good sleep does a Mommy good. Oh wait. I meant to say children. I sometimes think I am crazy for homeschooling. And, with the Mister deployed, I do go crazy some days. . . . Okay. I lie. On most days I do go crazy. Even with a good schedule in place, my SON still gets bored with his "school toys," the daughter who doesn't want to do her seat work while I'm working with her sister get up and cause a ruckus in another room. I would gladly grab some gates and gate everyone in but, NO. That would be too much for ME, the crazy woman who enjoys having her children at home.

Crazy, I tell you, is my new name. I wonder if there is a better way to manage the house? How does a normal person do this? I suppose a normal person would follow cultural norms of the 21st century, right? So I'm out there I geuss. I better rephrase that. How does a Christian Navy wife, mother and teacher to 3 children do it without losing too many marbles? I do not have too many to dole out but I suppose I can lose a few on the way if I had to.

I just realized that the Mister will be gone the rest of this year. Whew!!! We are finally down to the last few months! The end is near and I am ready for the long awaited homecoming! I wonder if this is what it will feel like when Jesus returns? Not that we know a sure day of that happening, but the anticipation of just KNOWING he's coming back soon. . . . . Hmmmm, you thinking what I'm thinking? That seeing Jesus, knowing he's coming to get YOU to take back to your real home is better than seeing your husband who hasn't been home in over a year? I know, no comparison, but gosh. If I'm this excited in anticipation to welcome the love of my life home, I can hardly imagine the joy of seeing Him when He comes to get me!

Saturday, September 4, 2010

We had a viewing for my house this afternoon. Which is great. Except I wish they were not early! I was still doing the dishes when they showed up. Didn't seem too promising though, they did a quick walk through as my kids swarmed around them asking a million questions. I felt like because we were here they rushed through the house like we had the plague.

I am not sure how much longer I can take this whole home selling situation. I want it to be over and done with two months ago. I am going insane with keeping the house spick and span. Not saying I don't love a clean house but who lives like this? Seriously? I feel like I am living in a magazine and my husband isn't here to help me out.

I think that's what's got me going. All this without Schuyler here for another few months. This deployment has me going through one jump and another doing this and that. Him over there telling me do this and that not having any control and wondering why I can't do things on his timeline. Seriously. It's a cause of major irritation. I don't like fighting or anything of that sort. Especially with him half way across the world. UGH.

Friday, September 3, 2010

This morning I braved the comissary. Normally I do not on a Friday. Or right before a 3 day weekend. Or within 2 days of pay day. And most definitly when all those things happen at once. BUT. I was desperate. I figured with the wake of the hurricane that only gave us some rain I may have had a fighting chance with the crowds. We get there and much to my surprise, the parking lot is not too bad and the inside were no crowds. Shelves were stocked with the food I needed and my children were well behaved.

I love it when that happens. My morning was awesome. I should be okay till next week!

Monday, August 30, 2010

Pretty hairs & Boys

So, I love hair things. For my daughters. Too bad one of my daughters does NOT like hair bows. Or anything hair related. She is one to just keep her hair down all the time unless forced to put it up due to sports. And even then, it's up right before practice/game and then out as soon as she knows it is over. Or if we are hanging with a dear friend who always pulls out a hair tie to put it up! Ha ha ha ha. Makes me sad in a way because I LOVE doing their hairs and making them all pretty.

Now, of course, when doing beautiful things to Moira and Eliza's hair, Alex gets a bit jealous. I must "do" his hair too. Poor guy, he can't catch a break. No pretty, frilly clothes to wear or cool hair bows to put in. Just boy things. I must admit, boy things are pretty neat too. I'm begining to enjoy going down the "other" aisles at the store. You know which ones I am talking about. The ones laced with browns, dinosaurs & TRUCKS. Lots of trucks. Sure sure, Alex likes his dolls, well, more like his sisters dolls. But he truly loves his trucks and dinosaurs. He GRAVITATES towards them. It's as though he has this 6th sense for such things even if he can't see it. He just knows there is something with wheels around or something that he can make destroy the "house" his sisters built with pillows.

So there you have it. I need hair bows and cool trucks.

Sunday, August 29, 2010

So, what's your idol?

This journey of a healthy body really makes me hungry. I am hungry ALL THE TIME. Most of the time I am just a little rumbly but then after a couple hours, I am starving. And I really have to keep myself in check from gorging. Know what I mean? I know, it's a good thing since I eat more that I should normally. But I'm thinking of food constantly. I'm planning and thinking of the next meal, my next snack, what I have in my fridge or pantry that I can snack on, or what I can sneak eat because I really don't want my children to eat it (as in it's unhealthy or we're about to have a meal).

Totally my idol right now. And I'm trying really hard to distract myself from such thinking. Homeschooling seems to help and once Awana & socccer starts in a few weeks may also help me because I'll be forced to plan more carefully and not deviate from my weekly meal planning. Well, I know if I keep my focus on the good things I can keep my mind of the obvious!

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

A little OCD?

So I'm a little obsessive sometimes. Like when I get an itch to clean out my van! I love my van. Only way you can tell is that I practically live in it. The van has mats on top of the carpet, which is a very good thing since we sometimes picnic in there. The mats may have started out the same colour as the rugs but it is now a rainbow of stains. There are pink, brown and black stains of various shades that do not come out, no matter how many times I have it professionally steam cleaned. Trust me. It's been shampooed and steam cleaned and scrubbed with elbow grease by yours truly. Stains are not coming out. Seats are too but I assure you the seats are alright, you will not grab a print on your rear end if you sit in my car.

Anyhow, I cleared it out today. Took the chairs out and vacuumed. Wiped it out with hot soapy water. It may not be pretty and you can't eat off the floor but you will not crunch on some random cookie someone left on the floor or slip on the other banana peel my son threw down. And you will able to see the floor in all it's stained glory plus I will not have to clear off the chair for you to just sit in there for a ride! :)

And yes, I did fairly well today on my way to a healthy self! Woot!

Sunday, August 22, 2010

Weight? What weight?

I'm in denial no longer. After your child says "You mean get fat like you Mommy?" during a discussion about eating healthy and staying active I can not be in denial anymore. As much as that hurt my feelings, it wasn't like I could tell her "No, not like Mommy" because I am very obviously over weight. And how does a parent explain to her child that your body is your temple and should take care of it when I am not?

So, here I go again on a journey to lose some weight. Not aiming for super skinny but a healthy weight. I do not want to be ashamed at what I look like. My whole body image is very poor. I wear clothes that hide what I can't hide. I eat to comfort myself even when I'm very full. I eat because I'm bored. I don't excercise not because of my knee even though it limits me to what I can do, I don't because I'm lazy. No more! I'm tired of being tired. I'm tired of neglecting what I should not be. My house is clean, now lets clean up the body! I'd like to shop in the regular section at Target and not the plus side!

Now I'll need to have some support here gals! I may drive ya'll nuts with my ramblings of food and excercise but I know eventually I'll see the results soon!

Thursday, August 19, 2010

I have the Joy down in my heart, HUH?

Today in the the car, I put on Veggie Tales Sunday Morning Songs. Very nice since all my children L-O-V-E this particular album. The song "I've got the joy joy joy down in my heart" came on and, in pure Veggie Tales fashion, after each "Down in my heart" Larry says "Where?" or "Huh?" And of course my Alex is always a beat late with this since he is still learning the whole melody and beat thing, you know being 2 and all. He'll get the hang of it. I hope.

Beats, timing and music seem to be our "new" love again. We have an array of children music we love, for example, we love Laurie Berkner, Veggie Tales, Go Fish and several Christian music artists like Chris Tomlin and Kutlass. We are again stomping around like dinosaurs and showing each other our uvulas, or scibia according to Eliza. (And if you don't know what your uvula is, please feel free to ask my 7 yr old or my 5 yr old. . . . . Go ahead, they know where it is. Or better yet, ask my 2 yr old, I'm sure he can tell you too.) My children also happen to love the music from our previous phonics program, Alphabet Island. It is so popular that I had to copy it to my iPod. So if you want to learn about your vowels, short and long, which ones are boys or girls, and which order they go in to make our spelling words, by all means please come over.

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Deployments. . . Are you ready?

I just went over to Whitney's blog and was reminded of deployment checklists. . . .Got me thinking that on my list I should have put "car mechanic" it. Who would have thunk that I would have such car troubles when my husband left on deployment a year ago? And only in the last half too. . . I'm so glad to have such wonderful people to support and help to get a car back up.

With being a Navy wife, it comes with certain expectations. Such as your daughter locking herself in her room and the only way to get her out is to take apart the door knob. I thoroughly enjoy such wonderful things, it keeps me on my toes, to always expect the unexpected. These little reminders help me to appreciate when my husband is home and what God has in store for our family.

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

DMV, I love you. . .

This morning I attempted to renew the registration on my husband's vehicle but I was unable to online or on the automated phone line. Much to my dismay, I have to make a treck to the actual DMV with all my kids in tow. Why you ask? Because they want to see me. . . .. with my Power of Attorney. They want to know that I am not using his information for some malicous reason. Like not paying certain property taxes where he is exempt from paying because he is active duty miltary.
So lovely. I enjoy going to the DMV. Not really. Department of Motor Vehicles is the actual bain of my existence. I pray to go in there with no detesting and a smile on my face. I will not get stressed out when my children start running the legnth of the building and laugh at the security guard when s/he tells them to obey me. I will love the looks from the elderly that wish they were secretly back in their homes away from my noisy kids. Oh I want to cry and I have not even left my house yet.

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Potty Bliss?

I love potty training. Well, I should call it Potty Bliss. Soon I will no longer have to purchase diapers. Or wipes. I will not spend $60 a month on various diapering paraphenlia. I can forgo that whole aisle completly at the comissary.

Currently my day consists of running a toddler to the potty in an attempt to teach him where certain body functions happen. Sure Sure, he knows where the SHOULD go. Whether or not he actually does it is a whole other story. I think, maybe, we have reached the critical point in our relationship now. Ha ha ha! He knows. And he knows I knows he knows. You know? Have I confused you yet?

Do not dispair. Do not do spell check on my blog. And do not come to my house without calling first. I have a plan. The plan involves purchasing lots of underroo's and stock in laundry detergent. And, with lots of prayer and work, by Christmas I will have a potty trained boy!!!

I want to remember this experience. Potty Bliss!

Thursday, August 5, 2010

HEY YOU GUUUUUYYSS!

I love my kids. They sure do break up my day and make it enjoyable. Although we have had no blow ups of any poopy kinds lately. (You wait, as soon as I am done here there will be a poo blow out.) I do have a son who is exploding in his vocabulary. My daughters have taught him to say "Booyah" which, when he utters it comes out: "Boo. AH! HA HA HA!" It's quite funny when said in the comissary surrounded by elderly shoppers in the cereal aisle.

Speaking of poopy kinds, Alex-Boy is potty training. Officially. "Fun! Yay, Good for you!" is what you say but what you SHOULD say is "Oh I'm sorry for all that extra cleaning you have to do." And then you should offer to follow him around whilst he runs with neeky bottoms. Yup. That's how my girls did it. And while I did not mind cleaning up after them, I also did not have my home up for sale and rather new flooring all through my house. I am in need of some different ideas.

Friday, July 30, 2010

What you say, Willis?

This morning we did nothing, per usual lately. I sat here and wondered "why am I just sitting here doing nothing and letting my kids just do nothing?" Up we left the house *gasp* to drop some boxes off for a friend and then to the Aquarium. The children had loads of fun to just be OUT and doing something that stretched their minds a bit.
Oh to start school again so soon. Wow, did I just say that out loud? I'm not mentally prepared to start up our school routine again. Although we are ready with all our stuff, I'm just wanting to sit. I need to get some motivation in wanting to start back up.

Thursday, July 22, 2010

Last Leg

We are at the last leg of the deployment. This one is really long and I really dislike it. Today I dropped him off at the airport and then I just cried. Last night Schuyler just held Moira for 30 min while she just cried and cried. Ugh, so depressing!!! I know I know, being married to a Navy guy, this is part of the job but still. Doesn't mean it's not hard! Have I told you this really stinks?

Okay so I'm off to take the pizza out of the oven and get ready to sleep in my big ol' bed all by myself!!!

Sunday, July 4, 2010

Yay!

Excitement is abound in my house. Why? Because the man is coming home. The breadwinner, the husband, the father, the best friend. He may only be home for a few short weeks, enough to get over the time change and back he goes half way across the world. BUT this trip means we are half way through our deployment. The stress will be gone for a little bit and we will only worry about spending time together. As a family and as a couple. Gosh I miss him. It's one thing when we didn't have children and our marriage was a bit wishy washy.

Now we have kids and we're more committed to each other as a married couple than ever. Our relationship is more centered on God than on how we FEEL. Does this make sense? And our kids see this, well, I hope they do and that I also hope it reflects in their life too. Anyways.

We are also moving soon and we're excited about where we are going. It will be a nice break from crazy traffic life and slow down. I love moving. Just not the transition. I have never done well with transition. But knowing where we are going helps a lot and we have plans of action if some things don't go as wanted helps a lot too. The Mister reminds me constantly that God knows and His timing is always perfect.

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

I really LOVE

I love my husband. I love my children. I love where we are in our life. Right now. And I love where we are going. I love God and how He provides everything. From the food on our table to the sanity needed for daily life, mostly by the minute lately but more on that later.

When I step back to look at my life, I have to be thankful. Even for all the stress that I'm under. Some days, okay, so most days, I feel it more than others. Say when it's 3pm and I wonder why the floor looks I haven't swept in days when I did just that 2 hours ago (right after lunch) and all my children are all of a sudden pouncing on me whining to go play outside in the HEAT. I genuinly don't feel stressed about day to day living seeing as when my husband normally is out at work all day anyways, it's knowing he is deployed and not coming home that really just gets me some days. I cherish the time with my children but when they are in bed, I get lonely. I miss him just sitting there even when we don't talk. I miss adult time with my husband! The support when he is home is different than the support when is gone.

Lately though I've been a bit on the emotional side. I have no idea why. Everything is just making cry! Could be I'm tired and need a break in the monotony of life. I'm ready for Schuyler to be home. Even if it's only for a short while! Could also be that we don't know where we'll be in 6 months and the house has yet to sell. I'm really having trouble with the whole house selling. I wish it would sell quickly but I know in my head that it's all in God's timing.

It's getting my head and my heart to work together. Seriously. I know it will happen. I love my house. It's just the right size for us right now. I love it and wonder if anyone else will love it?

I better get going though. Bring this entry to a close to eat some dinner and put kids to bed! I love my life. Thank you Lord for all the people who make it wonderful.

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Hey there

I'm here. Sitting on my couch trying to figure out what activities my children can do while I'm recovering from knee surgery. I need to stock up on play doh, paint and paper crafts. Plus I need to stock up on groceries. Not just veggies & fruits but also big packs of snacks and easy, fast recipes for my family to fix while I'm down under. Srsly. I'm reminded of the episode of Jon and Kate plus 8 where she makes all those dinners before leaving for a tummy tuck. Oh the irony I would compare myself to her when I am not anything close to the Type A personality. If only my mother could send off some of her type A-ness over the phone then I'd be all set.

Saturday, May 29, 2010

Frustrations

I've decided I don't like selling my home. People just say things that I can't even change. Say, on Friday, the buyer said the rooms were too boxy. Another said they didn't like the floor plan and the street parking. As if I could just change how the rooms are and where people park? Here, let me pull money out of the sky to change it to what YOU want, will that make you want to buy my house any more? I didn't think so. Why even come to my home and say those things? Just say the home doesn't work for you and leave it at that. Or give feedback that I can actually do that is cost efficiant? Say, I can update the cabinets, new handles and a sanding down/repainting of them. Maybe new counters, I can do that. But to say my house is too old or that you don't like my neighborhood just irritates me. I don't want to know that because I can't FIX that!!

The next home we purchase will hopefully be the home we live in till we are old and gray. This is too stressful. I want to throw my hands up.

Monday, May 3, 2010

Hey there

I am looking forward to the summer. I know this summer is a major transition one for us but it also means a slowing down of schedules. I have knee surgery in June, Schuyler comes home for a bit the next month, hopefully, and God willing, a move to NE the following month. Sounds like a lot but really, to me, all that happens with a spirit of Grace. I am getting used to the idea of moving soon.

Glad all the "junk" is out of my house and now it's nice in here. The way it should be. The way I want it to be. All nice and fresh. I'll be happy to sell it to anyone. Any takers? Ha ha ha ha ha. My house has been on the market for only a week and already 4 people have come to look at it. Outstanding I think! No takers yet but soon.

I'm all over the place today but, really, I am loving this. I'm loving God working in my life. The changes and the lessons He teaches me. How things can change in my life and He is always the same. Constant. Plus the nice hot weather is wonderful too.

I may not like sweating but seriously, I could use it. And my kids love playing in the sprinkler! This weather is so nice. Such a nice change after the winter! Anyways. . .
Next week is a big week for us, so pray that it goes well. I can't really tell you what till afterwards though I am busting at the seams to say on my oh so public blog! This week I hope to have a new garbage disposal and a new storm door. And today I may do some grass planting in the back yard depending on how my knee is feeling later.

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Hmmmmmm

I have to have knee surgery. Not surprising since I still have issues with it 3 months after I sprained it. I have to have my meniscus repaired and the doctor will look at my acl to see if that also needs to be repaired. Hopefully it'll just be the meniscus.

I'm actually pretty nervous about it. I am not one for pain. Come to think of it, I don't think anyone is. With us trying to sell the house, my stress level has gone up a bit more. I worry about the care of my children while in recovery, how soon am I able to get up and walk around? How much pain is this going to entail? Will I have adequete pain management while still being able to care for the house and my children? Who will come help me those first two weeks? Am I going to find a sitter for my children while I go to physical therapy 3 days a week for 3 weeks?

So much goes through my mind about this. . . . .

Friday, April 23, 2010

So .. .

A fresh blog for a fresh new start, I suppose. Clearing things out of the house to sell it. It seems a little depressing watching all my stuff come down to put fresh new paint up and all. Selling this house means a new begining for another part of my life.

A new life either here in the same area or in another part of the world. The children are at a place now where they are wanting to stay here. This is house is all they have ever known, really. The younger two learned to crawl, walk and talk here. The youngest was born here! The oldest, Moira, never remembers living in Texas or any of our life back there. I really do love living here. I call this place my home now. My hometown. I could very easily see myself growing old here in a nice little home somewhere close by. But, alas, my husband and God has other plans. Which fuels my desire to travel and to appreciate home, wherever it may be. That wherever God has us go, as long as I have Him, my husband and my children, I'm happy.

I've been learning lately to depend more and more on God. That He wants a relationship with me and not just a parent/toddler kind of one. Know what I mean? God's been showing me how very imperfect I am and how much I really need to rely on His grace and mercy to get through every hour of each day. Truthfully though, I feel like I haven't been doing such a great job but I hope each day will find me closer to Him and in then closer to my husband.

Anyhow, I better sign off. . . . my first blog in years is very scattered but I hope to get more cohesion as time goes on!